Think you’ve found The One? We asked relationship experts to help us spot the clues that indicate serious boyfriend (and beyond) potential. Here’s what to look for when separating the princes from the toads.
He puts you first.
Picture a delicious platter of grilled steak. Does your man offer it to you first to pick the best piece? He does if he’s a keeper! “When it comes to taking the best piece of meat or offering it to you, that’s a metaphor for how he’d always put you first the rest of your life,” says Rachel Greenwald.
He tells you he can’t wait to see you.
He texts you on Wednesday just to say he’s looking forward to your date on Friday. He uses an emoji, even though he doesn’t usually because he knows it will make you smile.
He has his act together.
This seems like a no-brainer, but it’s a good place to start. “It’s very important that you two be able to have a lot of fun together, so a party boy or a screw-up will probably not work out for you,” says Mira Kirshenbaum, a family and couples therapist and author of Is He Mr. Right? “No matter how charming he is, if he is still struggling to grow up, it will get very old, very fast.” You can’t stop telling your friends about how nice he is. You’ve been on so many crazy dates that you know how rare this can be.
He’s your biggest cheerleader.
When your guy calls your mom to tell her about your promotion before you do, that should tell you something.A man who is supportive of you and your goals is typically a guy who doesn’t “feel threatened by your success,” says Kirshenbaum. “He knows who he is and where he’s going,” which means he can ultimately be there for you.
Thinking about being alone with him gets you through a chaotic day.
Sometimes your mind just drifts to him in the middle of a meeting, and you zone out until someone snaps you back to reality.
He makes sure to see you one or two nights every week. And you see each other at least on Friday or Saturday each week, so you can stay up late and sleep in together free of mid-week stress.
He researches new things to do in a city you’ve lived in for years.
You love your go-to spots — and hope to establish regular ones with him — but it’s really sweet when he puts effort into finding somewhere you’ve never been.
He wants to do something special for your birthday.
So what if it’s a random number like 27 or 32? He thinks you deserve a celebration.